When You’re Sad at Christmas Time

Feeling Sad at Christmas Time


When You’re Sad at Christmas Time 

Merry Christmas, dear friend! How are you? How are you really? I want to know. So often we greet each other, and the answer is supposed to be: “I’m fine,” or “Great!” We don’t want to share more, and the other person most likely does not wish to hear how we truly are. We’re all busy and in a hurry.

Well, I’m going to break the ice, and share what I’ve been feeling and how I’m learning to cope with those feelings.

A couple of weeks ago I was feeling sad and a little downhearted. When you are single, no husband or children, Christmas can be a time of reflection and questioning. Was I wrong to focus on ministry instead of marriage? I think about this, but I come back to the truth: I have had a very adventurous and fulfilling life as a single missionary in Japan and then as a single woman living here in the States. I am content in the Lord, but sometimes when I’m feeling lonely, I wonder what if…

Also, my parents are gone as well as an aunt and uncle and both of their sons, my two cousins. Our families enjoyed celebrating the holidays together. Christmas is just not the same with these loved ones not here anymore.

Maybe you can relate to what I’m saying, or you might have other reasons for feeling melancholy this Christmas season.

If you have small children, you may be very excited about Christmas and all the activities. What is more fun than to see your child play an angel or Mary or Joseph in the church Christmas program! Maybe this doesn’t apply to you personally. You may have a friend who is feeling sad, though.

One short sentence with three different meanings has helped me cope with my feelings:

1. You’re not alone. Others are feeling the same way. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share how you’re feeling.

A co-worker and I were talking. How we both were feeling came up in the conversation. She was also feeling sad. Then I heard others were feeling the same way. I knew in my head that other people would be sad during the holidays, but I was still feeling alone. Then talking with others helped. I had to come out of isolation and speak my feelings. I’m not alone. You’re not alone either. Share with someone how you’re feeling.

2. You’re not alone. Though many loved ones aren’t here, look at the ones who are with you. Love on them. Invest time and energy in their lives.

I’m concentrating now on the family and friends that are here. I have a sister and cousin nearby and two nieces that I love dearly. And friends. And I am a CASA (Court-Appointed Special Advocate) for a foster child. I am blessed to know her and support her.

3. You’re not alone. Jesus, our “Immanuel” (“God with us”), is here. Seek comfort in Him and not in the trappings of Christmas—spending money, gift giving, and all the food. Not saying, don’t enjoy the gifts and food. What I’m saying is, don’t let them distract you from Jesus and don’t use them as distractions from your pain.

As I focus on Jesus, worshipping Him, adoring and loving Him, I sense His comforting presence. Tears may not be far away and easily spill over at a memory or at a scene on TV that touches my heart. I am thankful for being able to grieve and to have the comfort of the Lord.

Dear friend, we are not alone! May the glory of Jesus’ birth fill your heart with joy and wonder. I love and appreciate you! Thank you for joining this Grace Breakthroughs Journey. 2016 is going to be an adventure!


Please leave a comment about how you are feeling and how you cope at Christmas. Your words may be the encouragement someone else needs.


Photo credit: cocoparisienne/pixabay.com

Live the Life Jesus Died to Give You

- Explore Abba Father's heart of love -

- Experience the grace of Jesus -

- Enjoy the fellowship of the Holy Spirit -

Be transformed! Come alive!

Powered by ConvertKit


  1. Lucy Hanson Hohnson says:

    I too feel sad around Christmas. Always hated it, not for religious reasons more because growing up it was just me and my mom as of 10yrs old and after my mom passed it was just me and my daughter. No parents and no siblings, I am an only child. In later years I’ve come to embrace it a little better. As a single parent it was financially stressful and that really depressed me. I think it has become so commercialized and it’s true meaning is lost. Happy Holidays to all reading this!

    • Christine says:

      Lucy, thank you for sharing about your Christmas experiences. I hope that this Christmas is not a stressful one for you. Praying that the real meaning of Christmas, the birth of our Savior, Jesus, will bring you peace and joy this year. Praying that your daughter will also have a Christmas filled with love and joy.

  2. Rosa Barrios says:

    I recently lost my husband! This is the first time in 33 years I’ve been alone on the holidays. My twin boys, 25, they live with me,. This has been very hard on all of us. We miss him so much. Knowing that our Lord and Savior is coming soon is what’s getting me through this hard times. But the loniness is really hard. My husband and I did everything together. I miss and love him so much. Please pray for my children and I during these difficult find. God bless.

    • Christine says:

      Rosa, so sorry to hear about your loss. My heart goes out to you. Thank you for sharing about your husband. I will be praying for you and your sons. I can’t begin to imagine the pain that you are experiencing now. I saw the picture of you and your husband on your Facebook profile. You looked so happy together. Praying for the comfort that only the Lord can give.

  3. kerese Green says:

    This is such an àwsome encouraging comforting post …. Mrs Rosa I’m so sorry for your lost I can’t imagine how you’re feeling I am.praying for you and your family.
    This Christmas with the recent end of relationship I am very sad and heartbroken and scared for the future sometimes and anxious too. My constant prayer and song is help me be still and know you are God hill song
    Its lonely too so this post was perfect and timely. God using you to speak into our lives, keep writing for the Lord <3 <3

    • Christine says:

      Hi, Kerese. Thank you for your encouraging comment. I am sorry that you have been going through such a tough time. Your constant turning and clinging to the Lord in your grief really encourages me. I like how you are so honest about your feelings. Praying that the Lord will heal your heart and give you your heart’s deepest desires.

  4. Juanita says:

    Hi Chris. I have to say I was caught up in the trying to create the perfect picture of a commercial family Christmas. I woke up this morning and my heart was opened to what I know to be the reason for my Christmas celebrations. Or what it should be. I looked up your blogs and was encouraged by your sharing your feelings. I praise God for All things. Thank you and God bless you. Love J

    • Christine says:

      Juanita, thank you, my friend, for reading my blog. Praying that in this new year, you will experience the Lord’s presence and love in ways that will delight your heart.

Comments are closed.